Forgive and Forget

We’ve all been burned by people we love several times in our lives. The sad thing is that, until we die, it is going to continue to happen. How we handle these situations can say a lot about our character. Unfortunately, there are a lot of folks out there that hold onto the past way too long.

Throughout my life I have burned a lot of the folks I care about. Whether I made harsh comments to them in front of other people, stuck them with expenses that I helped create, or just was flat out rude to them on several occasions, I know that I’ve caused my share of pain to others. Luckily for me, some of the folks in my life have had enough time to start getting over the things that I’ve done to them in the past. Some folks are still holding onto the past though. It really puts a damper on our relationship as I have little to no tolerance for that kind of behavior at this point.

I was surrounded by several of these types of situations during one of my Christmas celebrations and it is still really bothering me. There is one particular person in my family that has done some things in the past that upset several other family members (although I am not aware of what the person has done). Even though I’m not around this person a whole lot, I’ve noticed that over the past several years she has really reinvented herself and I really respect that. When it was mentioned that she was on her way to our family Christmas celebration, there were a lot of other folks that started making snide remarks. Why are they holding onto things? Her visit was pleasant and her kids well behaved. This left a sour taste in my mouth. I later found out that one of my mother’s siblings was angry with her and it had to do with something that happened regarding this “shunned” family member. Evidently, this person’s own father had basically written her off. When he fell ill and landed in the hospital, my mother took it upon herself to send text messages to this “shunned” person giving her updates on her father’s status. Seems like the right thing to do, huh? Evidently one of my mother’s siblings was irate that my mother sent those messages. According to what I observed and was told, this sibling is still holding onto that anger over a month later during the freaking holidays. Really? There were several other instances of this very type of thing going on at Christmas. It is like that side of the family has to have someone to be pissed at regardless of the occasion. Needless to say, instead of a warm, loving environment there was a lot of shit talking behind folks backs. I’m glad I stay out of their drama.

Unless someone just really screws you over, you’ve got to move on at some point. Really and truthfully that forgiveness should come sooner rather than later. Life is too short to hold grudges for extended periods of time over petty bullshit. If more folks would forgive and forget in a reasonable time period then life would be better for everyone. Instead society has become so obsessed with being over-dramatic that these little events that should be comparatively insignificant in the grand scheme of things become overemphasized and dictate our actions and opinions toward people for ridiculous amounts of time. Personally, I pride myself on not being one of the over-dramatic fools. You should all make an effort to do the same. Isn’t that the Christian thing to do? Think about it this way; if you died unexpectedly tomorrow, would you have regrets regarding how you’ve treated and thought about someone in your life? Forgive, forget, and move on.

~ by jgdigitaljedi on January 3, 2013.